Ramblings of an Englishman In DC: DC United

Mr. Wright

Me and Ryan Mitchell attended a DC United game versus New England Revolution. DC United ended losing, however they played extremely good Football. My friend Ratt Moze introduced us the Barras the Firm of DC United, a bunch of crazy drunks who love the game of Football. After drinking a ton of beer and chain smoking cigarettes the game was being played to the screaming of chants from the Barra.

I loved it, but it's not like England. It's not worse or better just different. The one thing I loved the most is the tailgate. In England we have our local bars near the ground that the fans socialize and chat about the game to come. The tailgate is very much an American phenomenon in which fans BBQ and drink in the parking lots. In the tailgate I met Liverpool, Nott'n Forest Fans, Barcelona and even people that knew where I was from, Ipswich. Some even knew of my football team.

The thing that struck me the most was the cultural acceptance these fans have, people of different background, ethnicity, race, gender and age. They understand the power of the game and the brilliance of working towards the ground in a sea of Black and White, that feeling of unity and belonging to a group.

I can't say it was all positive I got in a swearing match because I was standing on the seat to see the game. I understand the need to create atmosphere in the game etc, but the constant flag waving during the game was incredibly annoying. I couldn't see the game and when I watch football I need to see every touch, pass and shoot. I found myself yelling to put the flags done, to the annoyance of one individual behind me.

"how can you ask them to put the flags down, when you are standing on the seats" DC fan
"we're standing on the seats so we can see the game" Me
"bullshit you can see the game fine without standing on the seats" DC fan
"ok I'll get down and see if you can see the game" Ryan
"Why don't you get involved instead of complaining" DC
"I am involved in watching the game and I'm reacting to the game" Me
"Where are you from?"
"Ipswich"
"oh that's why, I spent 5 years in London and went to Highbury"
"So gooner fans wave flags there so you can't see the game?"

The following conversation was a few exchanged swear words in which he tried to show he had picked up some of the great English curse words. I found this exchange funny rather than anything serious. DC United has great potential as does the MLS. Just get rid of the flags during the match. The passion and the game are rapidly increasing, as is the knowledge of the game. I'm now a DC United fan.

Frau Eva are gonna Pree some Art Space!

Returning triumphantly from a southbound tour that led them to SXSW, Frau Eva are back and ready to bring their rowdy (often violent) stage antics to the New Community Art Space.
Many fans are unaware that Frau Eva actually started as a laborer's trade union several years ago. Soon, after a budding friendship arose on the job-sight they noticed how musically cohesive they were and soon the band brought them enough success to quit their jobs and perform full time. Although they perform best in harsh climates this spring awakening should be quite fun.

That's (Pho)cked Up!

I'm sure you've already heard but John and Paul Royalty of US Thornley have unfriended Shauna B. Alexander over controversy concerning her Art Party.


RSBYT sat down with
Shauna B. Alexander
and Victoria Milko of Sticky Rice fame over Pho to discuss these harsh reactions.
But as it turns out, not only was the conversation not well documented, it wasn't very noteworthy, aside from the fact that Victoria was reppin' Durkl.
The BeadySetBYT camera has gone through a lot lately and no longer is in working order but luckily David Cabrera of Firefox Safari was there with his iphone to capture the magic.

Stamps: Bigger than Postage and always DTF!

In case you've been living under a rock for the last four months and haven't heard the infectious jam 'Dirty' all over the radio I got them to sit down at their computers and answer a few questions for all of our readers at RSBYT.

Listen to the hit new Single here

RSBYT: So what instruments do you play?
Stamps: Freya -The drums, Heidi- keyboard and synthasizer, Becca- Vocals and guitar (currently looking out for a new bassist)

How was the recent tour with deerwolf and the Day Laborers?
The tour went well. we kept things very rock n' roll. we had to cancel more than we'd have liked, but as artists we only share our work with those deemed deserving. most crowds were too small, not worth our time. deerwolf as a group really packed on the pounds on tour, too many drive throughs and not enough cocaine.

Who wears the pants in this band?
Well, figuratively speaking, probably heidi. she has issues with skirts and self respect.

Is it true you guys are collaborating with the Postal Service?
no comment, chris martin just called.

When you guys performed at the Perez Hilton party this year with Snoop, Matt Hemmerlein and Macy Gray were you guys at all star struck by John Popper? vaguely, it probably had more to do with the 3-D glasses.

Rumor has it that all of you have been secretly dating Sean Rex Goliath from deerwolf. Care to comment? Fractionally speaking.

Is it true you guys refuse to wake up in the morning if the first thing you see isn't champagne and/or pure columbian nose power powder? on sundays.

I heard the new track produced by Timbaland. I like. How was it working with a black man? everything's going to seem smaller in comparison.

What's next?
summer tour, kicking off in Canada. we announce venues 2 hours before the shows, so can't really tell you much else. currently laying some new tracks down, trying out some new sounds, channelling the beach boys and benny bennassi. for us it's all about the creative experimentation. and the money.
until next time,
DTF!


And there you've heard it folks: Rock is no where near dead, it's only lost its testicles.

Tennis System: This isn't working out.

So Jeremy 'Shapiro' Teter thinks he can roll with the big dawgs when it comes to competitive athletic sports. This may have proved true had he put down his god damned iphone and picked up a racket.
Unfortunately the world will never know, because the whole time spent at the courts dude was texting. The worst part is, I'm not even allowed to post what/who he was texting because his girlfriend/maybenotgirlfriendanymore will get all pissed at him... but whatever. Here's the pics.

US Royalty gets Saved!

Many of us in the sanctified realm have seen the immoral habits of rock musicians. But in South Carolina the spirit of Christ the almighty proved stronger than the destructive appetite of Rock and Roll.



The wet wind was howling that dark night. Across from some dump of a bar where US Royalty had an evening gig emerged the beautiful sound of Sweet hymns and RSBYT followed that sound. Rex Goliath and Buffalo China, of deerwolf were the first to enter the small dilapidated building where the church held congregation. They described the scene in detail.
"It was like wet cardboard meets witness protection." Rex Goliath, DC/NY's Poet Laureate said in his cunning prose.
"We were the only white people." commented Buffalo China. The righteous hymns were soon joined by some more white people, US Royalty of Ryan Wakeman fame. The Preacher's entire sermon was conveniently targeted towards musician types and as soon as he set down his washboard he started filling the ears of the back row of heathens. "You know my mother used to be a bootlegger!" the preacher shouted fervently.
"Amen!" refrained a churchgoer.
"Amen!" yelled another. and another.
"You might be making a lot of money now. Your pockets may be full and you might have a lot of fans," he continued to preach to no one in particular, "but your fans are gonna kick you to the curb. Your music will kick you to the curb. But guess what?" what? "Jesus ain't never gonna kick you to the curb!"
Really?
"Amen!" shouted everyone in various pitches and volumes. Whatever this guy was saying was definitely getting through to the crowd. Especially to the back row.
"I don't usually do this." the preacher warned, "But I have a feeling that there are some people here, that aren't here on accident. Ad that they know they ain't living right."
"Amen!"
"And that they want to know that there's more out there. That there's someone who cares about them. Not just for their music and their money, but cares for them! If that's you right now, I'd like you to come up here and meet Jesus Christ! Don't worry about what your friends might think is cool. Just come!"
The next thing RSBYT knew we were getting oil rubbed on our head and black people were praying for us and then everything went silent as the tears fell from our face.
"Now I know you've searched for answers. And you couldn't find it in a woman. Or a man. But you can find it in Jesus!" And with that he led us in prayer and we became saved. What a cinch.
Then we walked back to the rear pew and hung out with the girl in the green shirt with the Lovin' Leo mag and all the soul suffering rock musicians. But the Preacher wasn't done yet! Oh Lawd No!
"God's still calling to somebody in the back!" the preacher bellowed! "There's a woman in the back who needs to get right with God."
There wasn't.
There was a young chap with long hair, Rex Goliath, a man that rivals God himself in certain circles. The preacher kept on. (un)Fortunately one of the men in the church whispered in the preacher's ear and he carefully covered his mistake. "The young woman wearing green! God has word's for you..." and with that slick move no one had to see their god killed in wrath by the forces of deerwolf.

The Ramblings of an Englisman in DC: I want to club a seal to make a point

Mr. Wright

I bloody sick of the pseudo hippies in DC, if it was up to these pseudo hippies the human race would starve. Everything we eat a creature dies, it's either eaten, poisoned or it's natural habitat is destroyed. Yes you pseudo hippies every time you eat your pseudo carrots a poor helpless bunny rabbit dies from poison left by the farmer so it doesn't eat your pseudo carrots. How the hell can you grow food without killing other animals? please tell me.

Bloody hippies care more about animals than they do humans. Save the bloody rain forest is another thing I can't get my head around. The rain forests are being cut down to create farms so people in those poor Countries can eat. Why don't you just leave Countries who are trying to feed themselves alone and drink your Chai Tea and pretend to be cultured.

I really just want to club a seal, in fact by clubbing a seal I'm being a pseudo hippy because I'm saving the poor helpless fish they keep eating.... in actuality I just like Fish and Chips. If I'm being a ignorant Englishman and offending you, I'm not sorry because that was my intention. Go eat your bunny killing carrots, you dirty hippies.

Austin: Don't make this weird.

Here I am at the Levi's Fader Fort Blogger Lounge (seriously). I've been hanging out with DC's US Royalty, Matt Hemerlein's backing band and Deerwolf the hottest thing since skin cancer. So Co sponsored the deerwolf/US Royalty Levi's photo shoot last night!

Not only are the women breathtaking here, they turn into butter as soon as you tell them you're from vice magazine and/or playing a secret show with Beck.

Check out deerwolfmusic@twitter

Trottin around with deerwolf

Sorry for the absence of blogging to my hundreds of viewers. Aside from my heroin benge I've been covering the deerwolf/US Royalty spring tour!
You have to check out deerwolf. they are a mix between Stamps and Big Buck Hunter.

you heard it here first. Pics to come as soon as i get an iphone and learn how to road blog

Is it just me or has BYT hit puberty?

Let me make one thing clear:
Although DC blogs thrive on a competitive spirit, we all want to help each other out!

That is why ReadySetBYT granted locally syndicated Brightest Young Things a little interview.

We started off by meeting at this little spot called the Diner in Adams Morgan. After back and forth emails we found a time that fit my schedule and we met today over a late breakfast.

BYT sent one of their contributors, LIbby Elsworth. A professional young woman who proved to be more than well developed once her coat was off. I mean seriously, you should have been there. Anyways after our hellos we got straight to business.

I started off with a few starter questions like what's the name of your blog and what not but it wasn't long until I noticed the tables had turned. It seemed like I was the one being grilled with questions. The questions came hard and fast and soon I was in a daze of self reflection and sat pondering my faith in a futile God who probably doesn't care about the human race, least of all because he doesn't want to feel unnecessary pain. But once again I caught an accidental glimpse of my tablemate. I don't know if it was her well knitted sweater or a product of hormones in dairy products but it was hard to keep this interview on an eye-to-eye level.
Luckily the topic drifted towards Southeast Asian fetishes and if Stockholm Syndrome applies to those have been raped and I was back on my own turf. Things went swimmingly as i kept good note to keep my eyes above the horizon and the questions pelted our thick hides but we both emerged unscathed.

Night Club finds

The Art of the Dance

RSBYT spent a night on the town with local clothing designer Jessica Louise Dye and DC's Folk hero Lightfoot.
We followed her from the dressing room all the way to the nightclub!







The Spot: Dance Institute in DC's up and coming Columbia Heights

The Crowd: Ladies, ladies, ladies. Let me tell you guys, you will find no Sausagefest here. This club was just asking to be deflowered!

Some local celebrities even swung by to dance to DJ Stravinsky's sweet jams! Shauna B. Alexander of House Party (Fort Awesome) fame graced us with a wave to the camera.



Note to interested parties: This club has a strict dress code! Even though we are one of the hottest blogs in DC they wouldn't allow us to enter so underdressed.

One Less Car of the Week

The GreenPeace walking cane 2010


Post consumer Polyvinyl hand grip.
Carbon Etho-steel support shaft designed by Marc by Marc Jacobs for NASA.
Treadstrongtm rubber stopper reinforced by nanoshocks.

I was just blown away by how efficient and earth friendly this lady was. By not using a car, and always carrying her reusable grocery bag she's wiping clean the carbon footprints of .0009% of the average DC driver. I approached her to see if I could retrieve some words of wisdom for our readers.

RSBYT: Namaste.
Lady: what?

I took the chance to notice your walking stick.
...

Is that the GreenPeace 2010 with adjustable shaft?
what do you want?

Only to encourage you on your struggle. You may think you're just a dreamer. But you're not the only one.
uh huh.

Photo scenario made capable by Firefox Safari's David Cabrera.

Craigslist Creep of the Week

Gallaudet girls I met this weekend (tell me it is a small small world! - m4w (Air & Space Museum)

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Date: 2010-03-07, 2:33PM EST

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This is a shot in the dark but I think it would be wonderful if one of your friends saw this ad and thought "I know those girls!"

OK I don't sign, but I couldn't resist approaching you two lovely ladies. I was the guy who came up to you and pulled out the great equalizer in speech - my iPhone.

I wanted to chat more but alas! I was there with others as you know.

So, listen, since I know you are local why don't we meet up? You can teach me to sign and I can teach you some great cooking, and maybe we can play this new board game I just got this weekend! If you both want to meet up I'll bring one of my handsome, chivalrous friends.

So someone on Gallaudet can help me out right?! I'll pay a six pack in finder's fee!

The Ramblings of an Englishman in DC: Drinking age is a joke

MR. Wright

Drinking should be 18 not 21, in fact there shouldn't be a drinking age just mature people looking after immature people. Just because you are 21 doesn't mean you are more mature than someone who is 18. We should stop immature people from drinking too much and allow mature 18 year old's to drink. England we allow people who want a drink to have a bloody drink, it's their right. Damn DC for being stupid old geezers who think that 18 year old's aren't mature enough to drink. They're mature enough to kill people in a pointless war. Screw the health care bill this is an issue that has plagued American culture for years and shows a disconnect in older generations and younger generations. Ask every damn congress man and government worker if they drank before the age of 21! If they say they haven't they're just being great politicians and doing what they do best and lying.

Just allow 18 year old's to drink already, they are anyway. What's up with America's stupid laws, it's just as bad as "don't ask don't tell" you know there's homosexuals in the Military, is it because they think men who like men can't kill as well as straight shooters? I think if someone has the balls enough to fight in combat who cares who they sleep with. The Sacred Band of Thebes, one of the greatest elite fighting units of history consisted of all gay lovers. Achilles in the Homer classic "Iliad" was gay. America has some growing up to do.

The Barbary gets passed at the Crab's Claw

Last night God got a parking ticket and forgot about the rest of us. Luckily for those in he vicinity of Mt. Pleasant and Irving People shook their asses all night at the Crab's Claw!

Ava Luna played a great set for that house.

The opening act were the Silent Whys backed by Paul Thornley of Four Horseman fame on sound, these guys played music for the start studded crowd. Jeremy Teter of Shapiro System was spotted with his ex model GF. Alexis Kenyon soon to be of nineteenthandlamont Fame. Abby of Salon de Libertad. John Thornley of Matt Hemerlein, Sockett's Records Ryan Wakeman and Agnes of Sweden were swarmed by commonfolk craning their necks to get a longer glimpse of DC Fame.

Next up was Tosin Abasi of Animals are Leaders Too. Not only did he make the crowd feel more diverse by having a lot of fans that were black he owned the place with his completely unimpressive guitar noodling. Then came the funkfest of Ava Luna. I never want to see them again unless it's at a house show because I don't think any venues know how to mix sound as well. After their set some True Women put on their ipod and people started a drum circle in the kitchen.

Let's all give a hand to RSBYT photographer Cici or something like that. (some giggly asian girl)

My House Parties are ART!

2/1/10
First I start by going on my blog and posting a killer post about the killer party I wanna throw at my house. I asked peeps what kinda party it should be and whether I should have punch or Capri Sun. ANd if I should have bands or a DJ...

2/2/10
So I get a great on line response on my blog and shit gets confirmed. So I make another Post with all these great LINKS. I decided to do the whole shebang! I got Thievery Corporation confirmed to open for Firefox Safari. I got Gavin Holland and Chris burns confirmed to rock the turntables. Dakota and Tori Milko battling over who can send an epileptic into a seizure first and Jake Royalty to help out behind the bar.

2/5/10
I found out that my shit has got a little too real. RSBYT has decided to cover the event. So I texted my roommates that our party is gonna be as wild as Sister Act II. So they txt me back saying they're moving!

2/6/10 I put up a Facebook post about getting new roommates.

2/7/10
I send out the owls to make sure er'body gets the invites. the party is only 2 days away!!!!

2/9/10
Let's get this party Started!!!
4pm rolls around and I get the bad news! Gavin Holland and Chris Burns are bailing on me. Victoria and Dakota are shooting some bullshit at the Whitehouse so they have to send their apprentice and it turns out I don't even know Thievery Corporation and Firefox Safari isn't a real band! FUCK! What do I do??? So I call the only DJ left in town and hope for the best.

10pm: Guests Arrive! They all happen to be french or some nonsense, it seems the only press I got was at some BS hotel in Tysons that was hosting a french business conference and the photographer is some Ladie's 3 year old daughter and she'll only shoot my party if I cut her boyfriend's hair in the bathroom!


2/10/10
So clean up was a bitch. Those Frenchies stole all my antibiotics. All the pictures sucked cause they were taken by a 3 year old. But hey what do you do? Everyone had a good time.